i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
