5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
