Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
