DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
