The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
