Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
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