he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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