She went from zero to smokin in five shots
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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