For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
