You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
