awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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