yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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