So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
