So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Randomize
