Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
