Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize