try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
