susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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