Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
