Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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