he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
