so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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