Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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