I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Randomize