i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
honey bunches of taint.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
The Olympian is in my bed
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
wow bdsm is so cute
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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