it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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