remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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