this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize