he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
