A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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