Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
