The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Randomize
