Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
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