she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
