I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Are we still banned from the library?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize