Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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