you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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