When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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