Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
