i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Randomize
