there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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