I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
