My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
