I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
