plz talk dirty to me
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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