DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
high people should be assigned attendants
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
So many bounce houses so little time
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Randomize
