Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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