I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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