how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
His nipple licking is glorious
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