I'm lost and stupid without you.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
