Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
