take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
